Overwhelmed by You Read online

  ***

  Overwhelmed by You

  Published by Cindy Paterson

  Copyright © 2014 by Nashoda Rose

  Toronto, Canada

  ISBN: 978-0-9937023-2-7

  Copyright © 2014 Cover by Kari Ayasha, Cover to Cover Designs (http://www.covertocoverdesigns.com/)

  Content Edited by Kristin Anders, The Romantic Editor (http://www.theromanticeditor.com/)

  Formatting by Self Publishing Editing Service (http://selfpublishingeditingservice.com/)

  Line Editing by The Polished Pen

  Proof Reading by The Polished Pen

  Table of Contents

  Prologue

  Chapter One

  Chapter Two

  Chapter Three

  Chapter Four

  Chapter Five

  Chapter Six

  Chapter Seven

  Chapter Eight

  Chapter Nine

  Chapter Ten

  Chapter Eleven

  Chapter Twelve

  Chapter Thirteen

  Chapter Fourteen

  Chapter Fifteen

  Chapter Sixteen

  Chapter Seventeen

  Chapter Eighteen

  Chapter Nineteen

  Chapter Twenty

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  Epilogue

  Dedication

  A message from the Author

  Acknowledgments

  What’s Next

  About the Author

  Tear Asunder (With You and Torn from You)

  I swung the statue down onto his skull again and again.

  The sound of crushing bone crackled throughout the room.

  Blood splattered my green T-shirt like a mist of rain.

  I didn’t care. Not one bit.

  He destroyed her.

  He deserved this.

  Images of the bruises on her arms, the puncture marks, blurred my vision.

  She watched me kill him.

  Sitting on the floor, dazed with a glassy look in her eyes.

  This was my fault.

  I let this happen to her. I didn’t protect her.

  I threw the statue aside. It made a loud thud as it hit the wood floor, and she jerked. I glanced at the needles on the bedside table. The yellow elastic band.

  I was glad he was dead.

  I strode over to her, picked her frail, weightless body up, and ran.

  Her beauty was wilting. My angel. I had done that.

  Ream

  “Babe … You’re going to fuckin’ kill me.” Body tightening, I groaned as my dick jerked in her mouth. “Ahh, Christ.” She withdrew then circled the tip with her tongue as her hand cupped my balls, only to slide a finger down further to caress between my butt cheeks. Holy fuck, I’d never been blowed like this before—ever. Shit, who was I kidding? I never let a woman have this kind of control over me. If I had … I didn’t like to remember it.

  The heat of her mouth surrounded me again, and she slowly took all of me until her lips touched my balls. I nearly came right then as I swore beneath my breath, my fingers fisting in her hair.

  “Baby.”

  Her silky moisture felt like I was wrapped in velvet. She slowly slid back and my hands curled into the sheet as the pressure increased until I slipped from her mouth. She took a breath then swallowed me again. I was so turned on, I couldn’t even think straight. Watching her take me like that … God, how the fuck did I ever get off before her?

  Her head bobbed up and down faster, then harder, and all I could hear was her sweet mouth sucking my cock like it was her Popsicle.

  I closed my eyes. Jesus, I never wanted it to end.

  Harder. Suck me, harder.

  My eyes flew open and I stiffened. No. Don’t ruin this. Fuck.

  But it always did.

  Be good and it won’t hurt.

  I was breathing too hard. I was too tense. It would hurt more if I was tense.

  Smack.

  Ask me for more.

  No. No, more.

  Smack.

  Ask me nicely.

  Mo … re. Plea … se.

  Fuck no. Jesus, why?

  Because I hated this and I needed to end it and get the fuck out—fast. Letting her go down on me was a mistake. I never let a chick put her mouth me. Shit, what had I been thinking? I thought it might be different after spending two weeks with her. I liked her, damn it. But I couldn’t do this.

  I grabbed her by the shoulders. “Get off me.”

  Her magnetic blue eyes widened, and I felt her hand jerk on my cock. “What?”

  “I said get the fuck off me.” My hands tightened on her shoulders and I felt the familiar sickness rolling in my stomach. I had to get the hell out of here. I should’ve never done this with her. I didn’t do sweet and slow; I did fast and hard and I was out of there before the bullshit barreled into me.

  I went to roll out from under her, but she found my hand that had a death grip on the sheet. Her fingers slowly pried open my fist, and then she entwined them with mine and squeezed.

  I looked down at her and for a moment I thought maybe I could … “No.” I said the word, but didn’t move.

  She lowered her head, but kept her eyes on me while her tongue teased the head of my cock. She kissed it, gentle and tender, something I’d never had before. And I wanted it, but chicks sucking my cock was off limits. It was them having power that let the demons in.

  I groaned as her tongue flicked over the sensitive tip. My fingers dug into her flesh and I fought the need to throw her away from me and, at the same time, push her head down on my cock, forcing her to take me deeper.

  “I want to taste you. Come for me,” she said.

  I couldn’t. Not like this. She had too much of me already. Fuck this. Screw all of it. I pushed her off me and her hand slipped from my cock as she fell to the side.

  “Ream?”

  I ignored her as I sat up and swung my legs over the side of the bed. I went to get up when her arms came around my neck.

  “What do you need?”

  “To leave.” I reached down for my jeans lying on the floor. This was stupid. I should’ve never hooked up with her. She was my bandmate’s girl’s best friend.

  I went to stand when she grabbed my arm and pulled me back until I lay on the bed. “Jesus. I don’t want to fuck you, Kat.” I knew it was a lie because I wanted to fuck this girl bad.

  I’d spent two weeks with her at the farm waiting for news about Emily and Logan. We’d unpacked all the boxes, painted the rooms, fixed fences for the horse paddocks, even planted flowers in the garden. Okay, she did that, I watched while drinking a beer.

  There was no question Kat was hot—long legs, blonde, beautiful bright blue eyes, and she had this angled jaw that made her look hard and intense, but Kat was … fun. Despite the emotional worry that we both felt for our friends, Kat wasn’t a sobbing mess. Shit, I never once saw her cry.

  When we’d met at the bar the night Emily was kidnapped, I’d seen her from the stage and my first thought was she looked like a snobby bitch. But she was hot, so I wanted to fuck her. Probably would’ve if shit hadn’t hit the fan with Emily.

  I’d found out over the next two weeks that Kat was nothing like I’d labelled her. Fuck, the girl had a strength inside her that surpassed my own. And that made me want to fuck her more.

  I was dragged back to the present when Kat leaned over me and our eyes locked. The corners of her lips slowly curved upwards with that sweet, sassy smile. “Bullshit,” she said. Her hand found my pulsating cock again and she stroked it once
. “This,” she squeezed and I groaned as the blood rushed to the head, “wants me. So, tell me what you need?”

  I never had conversations in bed with chicks, let alone had time to discuss what the hell I needed, because I always just took what I needed and then left. Always quick, hard and done before there was time for the darkness to fuck with me.

  But she’d already far surpassed my usual flings. I didn’t do repeats and yet here I was fucking the same chick over and over again and, to top it off, I let her suck my cock. What had I been thinking? I hadn’t been thinking, that’s how it had gotten this far.

  But Kat brought me back from my inner darkness that she didn’t even know existed. She’d kept it away. That was until she’d gone down on me and then it all went to shit again.

  For once, I wanted a girl … and not just to get off. I had no qualms about kicking a woman from my bed and had done it so many times now that I was numb to the hurt I saw on their faces. It wasn’t like I didn’t tell them straight up what it was before they spread their legs. I was discreet about who I fucked and I didn’t get emotionally attached; it was impossible for me. I was never meant to appreciate women. That was ruined for me a long time ago.

  But Kat … Kat was unexpected. She gave me what I needed. There was no clinging, no worshipping like the band’s groupies. I hated that.

  “I want you inside me again.” Kat straddled me and as soon as she did I abruptly grabbed her around the waist, and she squealed as I tossed her onto her back then crawled on top, pinning her in place with my weight.

  “You belong beneath me, beautiful.” This is where it was safe. Beneath me. Where I could walk away if I wanted. Where I could control her. I needed control. I could have it no other way.

  Kat laughed, her eyes sparkling like blue gems. I froze, staring at the woman trapped under me. Unfuckinexpected. We’d both decided that this was a one-nighter, although technically it had already become two. How did this happen? I asked myself this, but I knew how. It was like she fed a part of me that had lain dormant for years. Her honesty and ease, the way she moved without insecurity. Not self-absorption … no, it was purity. Something I didn’t have in any part of me anymore.

  Fuck, it had been me who’d woken up this morning with my arm slung over her waist. The shock that plowed into me had me do the only thing I could to get rid of it … I rolled her over, straddled her and sunk my cock in hard and abruptly.

  She’d woken up moaning and arching her hips up to meet my thrusts. I came within seconds. She didn’t and it was the first time I felt guilty for fucking a girl and not looking after her. But Kat kissed me and then got up and went into the bathroom where I heard the shower turn on.

  I lay back and the first thought that came to mind was if I should go in there and join her. I imagined licking her pussy, making her beg me, tasting the sweetness and hearing her moan beneath my assault.

  But I didn’t. I needed distance, to get my control back of my emotions. Instead, I listen to the water and imagined her hands rubbing over her body until I fell back asleep.

  That was when I woke to her sucking my cock.

  “Belong?” Her brows rose and I wanted to kiss that sassy look right off her face.

  I knew she wouldn’t like that comment. There was no question we’d clash; her confidence and sassy mouth, my need to control every situation, something I lacked as a kid and now had to have in every part of my life. That’s why the band trusted me to look after the negotiations. Nothing slid by me, I kept emotions out of business, and was never afraid to walk away if I didn’t get what I wanted.

  “Take it or leave it.” Harsh, but it had to be this way. Better she know that now.

  I narrowed my eyes as laughter trickled from her parted lips then she tried to slip away. I grasped her under the armpits. She thought I was teasing—I wasn’t. “You belong where I say you do, and that’s with me on top of you, sinking my cock deep inside that sweet, tight wetness. And make no mistake, it’s begging for it, Kitkat.”

  “Begging?” She licked her lips.

  I leaned forward until my mouth was so close to hers that if I took a deep breath they’d touch. Her chest stopped rising.

  Not yet, beautiful.

  Anticipation was the tie to control. I could control it. I knew how to make a woman want a man so badly she’d do anything to stop the aching need. It wasn’t something I was proud of, but I’d learned it and I’d use my skill to bend Kat to my will. If she understood that, then maybe I’d consider letting her stay in my bed a little longer.

  Her breath was like a warm breeze heating my skin. I tilted my head to the side and let the two day growth of facial hair graze lightly across her skin. I grunted when I heard the sound … that distinct inhale of air and then the quivering of her body.

  “Beg me.” I was used to being the one forced to beg. Now … now I had to have it this way.

  “Never,” she retorted.

  I could have her pliant in minutes, but the tightening in my chest was a reminder of what I tried to forget every fuckin’ day of my life. I had to walk away from this.

  Okay, one more time, and then I’d leave. She knew this wasn’t anything more than satisfying both our needs. She’d be good with that. The question that pushed into me like a bull charging was—was I? I buried it hard and fast, just like I did my cock between a woman’s legs.

  “Oh, baby, wrong answer.” Both my hands went to her wrists and I pulled her arms above her head and locked them there before she could protest. I may not get her to beg, because shit, I didn’t have the time for that, but I could make her moan and writhe beneath me.

  “Ream, let me go.”

  I knew my grip was bruising, but I needed her immobile. I needed her to submit to me, the nightmares were too close now to let her touch me. I shut her up by taking her mouth, my tongue pushing past her teeth and then sealing her words with my forceful, hard kiss.

  She squiggled with protest, her lush body still damp from her shower. It was delectable how her lips moved over mine willingly, meeting the harshness with her own even though she was protesting. I pulled away. “Beg me.”

  “No,” she breathed and struggled to free her hands. “Let me go.”

  Sweet fucking God, she was hot. Her breasts bounced and swayed while her body thrashed against me. The soft, heated glow in her cheeks made her look even more irresistible, and for a second I was the one who was losing control as the anticipation to sink inside her again outweighed winning.

  Kat nearly clocked me in the fucking neck as I loosened my grip and her one arm freed. Her elbow swung in front of me, and I had to lurch back. “I don’t beg. Ever.”

  My cock was throbbing between her legs and there was no chance I could let her go now. This wasn’t just about me getting off anymore. This was about letting her win and still getting my way with her. The anchor holding me down in the darkness of my fucked up past was easing as she lay beneath me breathing hard, her eyes wide and almost … scared?

  Fuck. What was I doing?

  “I’ll let you go, but new rules, don’t touch me.” I waited for her nod then I released her wrists. I suspected she’d have bruises there and a wave of guilt came over me. I hadn’t meant to hurt her, but my control was slipping with Kat and I needed it back. This was the only way for me.

  Her chest rose and fell, erect nipples grazing my chest with each inhale. “Ream, why did you—”

  I cut her off before she had the chance to ask questions. Ones I’d never answer. This was why fucking a girl more than once was a mistake. Too close. Questions. Wanting to do more than just fuck fast and hard.

  I crushed my mouth to hers and swallowed any further protests she might have had. Although, in the last forty-eight hours of us being in bed, Kat hadn’t protested anything I’d done to her. And I thanked fuck for that.

  She moaned beneath my assault, and her hands slipped into my hair. A cold shiver pushed past my desire and I froze.

  “No! Grab the headboard.” Her
fingers uncurled from my hair and I put my full weight on top of her as I rubbed my aching cock between her legs.

  She’s just another fuck. Just another fuck.

  Chicks were objects to me. I used them and they used me. I was always straight up about it and never had I let one stay the night. I’d never cuddled and never wanted to … until Kat.

  The demons still lingered, but with her … it was more than a hot chick I was fucking to try and erase the past. For once it felt real, not a machine screwing to prove to myself that this was what I wanted.

  As long as I could do it my way. If she could follow the rules then maybe the demons would stay away and we had a chance. I had a chance. Fuck, I wanted that with her.

  After spending the last two weeks with her, before even touching her pussy, I knew this was different. Kat was different. She was strong and direct, and it was refreshing as hell. This wasn’t some sappy chick hanging on every stroke of my guitar and then my dick. I’d been used all my life, but for once it didn’t feel that way, and I wanted that feeling to last. I wasn’t ready to let her go. I ran the tips of my fingers down the side of her face. “You’re fuckin’ mine, Kitkat.”

  Her eyes widened. Yeah, I shocked myself and hadn’t realized it until the words slipped from my mouth. But I was taking this chick … at least until I was done with her.

  “Babe?”

  She hesitated and I tensed when I saw the flicker of uneasiness in her eyes, but it disappeared quickly and in its place was her smoldering, flirty blue eyes. “I’m not yours.”

  Yeah, I figured she’d say something like that. Despite the way she fucked, she was standoffish.

  “But you can try your best to convince me,” Kat said.

  And I sure as hell could do that. I kissed her again—hard, unrelenting, as if trying to proving to myself that this was the usual fuck, but it wasn’t. I knew that. I’d known that before I even kissed her.

  When I pulled back, her eyes twinkled with desire. She wanted me—bad, and I fuckin’ loved that I could do that to her. I suckled her nipple then kissed my way down her body, hesitating over her belly piercing, swirling the little diamond around my tongue. I stared down at her, eyes closed, muscles tense with anticipation to feel my tongue on her clit. And I couldn’t wait to taste her again, have the power over her, make her scream with ecstasy. I rarely went down on a woman, that took too much time, but with Kat I’d tasted her twice already and watched her body writhe beneath my tongue.